Messin' With My Blues II

Hmm.

I'm still dreadfully reminding myself not to do what I ever did earlier in the day (buying a flower for each girl in class and giving the girl whom I fancy two flowers, and unfortunately causing her to become even more awkward and cold), and hopefully I can try and make things better tomorrow.

Sigh... I keep thinking that of all the things to have done this year, this is one 'funtastic' thing to have screwed up, not to mention that good ol' Murphy's Law (Anything that can go wrong, will go wrong) has focked me up the rear end again.

Yeah... I tried to learn 'Across The Universe' by the Beatles today (filled with sitars and wah-wahs), and i suppose it's ok to say that I ripped off the chord sequence to make a new song (about what just happened today). It's a bittersweet song kinda thing going on.

I simply cannot get it: I try to be a nice guy to my classmates, I try my best to fit in, I let them torture me with their horrigible music, I do their every bidding, I try and try and try and try... to no focking avail. What's happenin' (Use Gail's accent here)?

I dunno... maybe I'm just not one guy to try and approach women, or maybe I'm just taking failure too hard... but I simply cannot admit defeat so easily. Would a guy who's willing to do anything to get that gal just drop everything and hang himself? Fock no, I'm pretty sure any person wouldn't give up on themselves so easily.

Maybe it's bad karma? Could it be that I'm just barking up the same old wrong tree at the wrong time? At times it just seems so hard a dispairing when you got what it takes and it turns around and hits smack on the nose.

Did I mention she's actually older than me? Go ahead and stare... I'm barely 18, and people whom I've worked with, studied under, think I'm 25. She's already 18, but I thought she was 16 when I first clapped eyes on her. I suppose the trick with looking older is in the clothes... I seldom act my age anyway;)

I dunno, does she think since I'm younger than her therefore I'm not eligible? Or is it maybe I just hang out with folk like Alvin and play our funky brand of country... use profound humour... and simply play lame at any opportunity?

I gotta find a way to make myself more connected with this world or I'll just explode folks...


Cheers,

Crawldaddy