Storm in a fishbowl

Hmm.

Friday night I went to see Alvin's COGS musical 'Storm in a Fishbowl'. Let me give you a first-hand account of how the musical went:

Went to the new underground sanctuary at St. Andrew's Cathedral. Found Alvin's folks and sat down next to complete bimbo on the left and the nice Uncle Paul on the right. Emcee went onstage. Kinda geeky guy but nevermind. Had to refer to a few cards in his hand to refresh his memory of what he needed to say. Prayer was said, lights dimmed.

Show starts. Stage involves 5 elevated platforms which somehow make you wonder what they are for. Until flashing lights and music from the live band starts playing when you see the characters appear in their respective platforms and sing along to the intro song which eventually stops along with a cut in the irritating flashing lights.

Alvin's character, Kiat seems to be the typical money-faced yuppie whose drive in life is well... money. Veronica, his wife is typical naggy "tai tai" affair, played by a certain 13-year old Lydia Cheam whose demeanour suggests she could be a natural actress/nag? Note: way too much stage makeup on their faces. Look like dolls. Does Lydia look older or is it because she's of an age which is one year younger than what Alvin appears to be? Mic for Lydia also fails, so audience is left wondering why "Kiat" is whimpering loudly and uncontrollably.

Joshua Cheam plays your hopeless NS man, Andrew, who is tired and sick of life in the army. He shaves his head for the role. Clearly the SAJC crowd which shrieks in appreciation of his wooden acting and inadequate singing are there to see their fellow SAJCian work his lack of charisma. Isn't remotely moved by his performance.

Then comes along a good watch in the form of Deasiree who plays Debra the clueless schoolgirl. She is late for school for the first time and is at her wit's end as to how to go about her life due to lack of parental guidance. Definitely one of the best renditions of a typical singaporean schoolgirl I have seen. Too bad she doesn't act cute like her real-life peers.

Rachel Ang portrays the retired Betty, whose only (and most beloved) son seldoms visits her possibly due to her (apparently) evil daughter-in-law who insists in Betty being dressed in a chiongsam. Her character flits between the natural chor-lor auntie and the sophisicated british-accented prude. Performance-wise, she adds the dynamics required of her character, but thank goodness only a titch as wooden as the NS man.

Last of all to be introduced is Lawrence the fishbowl keeper, whose main focus of his life are his three fishes, Peter, James and John who are mercilessly under the intense spotlights of the stage light rig. He definitely give you that good-boy impression, and his performance isn't that bad either. Lack of experience is forgiven.

The story goes on to portray the 6 neighbours converging at the lift in the morning. Alvin's attempt at a straight face fails utterly. He looks like he might be retraining gas instead? Anyway...

The six neighbours exit the lift, and a conversation ensues between Lawrence and The Cleaner, which is punctuated by a song sung by "Lawrence". His singing is horrendous, despite help given to the audience in the form of lyrics projected unto screens on either side of the stage. Pitch issues aside, there is the terrible visual distraction taken in the form of The Cleaner, whose cringe-worthy rendition of the duck walk with his broom leaves something to be desired ("Infidel! How dare thee taketh away the trademark of the highly esteemed Angus Young?!").

Now the main focus of the play centres around Andrew the NS man. Apparently he chooses to sing whilst "playing" his guitar (insert music by live band here) and lying down somemore. In the background you hear his mother's naggy voice, followed by his father's boomy vocal telling him of future prospects and your whatnots. Bad singing does not do much to ease the pain with which I'm sure his SAJCians must be experiencing due to the garbled audio mess which combines the live band, the parents' voices and the singing.

"7:30 AM again" shows the neighbours once again at their usual morning rituals... Kiat and Veronica fighting, Debra the schoolgirl being late once more, Andrew sleeping, Betty waking up, Lawrence tending to his fish.

Converging at the lift once more, they enter and soon reach the ground floor (lift scene aided by lift video projected onto screens), only for a resounding boom to resonate across the hall and a red light flashes unto the characters who scream on cue to hammer in the effect of being scared and shocked. It works, and I'm delighted to be shaken out of the monotony... only to realise it's the intermission.

Intermission over, we return to the scene of distruction, where we find a waking Kiat rising from the rubble which is the basement/1st floor. He yells in vain for his missing wife, Veronica who is nowhere to be seen. Next to wake is Andrew the NS man, who is yelled at by an exasperated Kiat to "do something! anything!". What thing? the audience wonders.

Next to be awaken is Lawrence and the Cleaner. Betty is found, and after a while Debra, who appears to be unconscious. The classic "does anyone know CPR?" question is fired out, only for the obvious "Ok, I shall do it" to be met with squeals from the audience. Debra screams and jumps awake just as Lawrence's lips are an inch away from hers. Cliched, but effective I guess... as seen in the form of the delirious audience who roar with laughter.

Kiat still cannot find his wife. Lawrence soons teaches everyone how to straighten out their life by comparing then with species of fishes (insert "fishcake" joke here... Alvin you do not want to know what the fishcake joke is) and to 'trust the owner of the fishbowl because blah blah blah. Everyone except Kiat is touched by his words, who remains cynical and scorns Lawrence's zen-like peacefulness.

Another song is sung, along with a hokkien/cantonese rap breakdown section which goes compeltely over my head. I find it was absolutely uncalled for, and definitely reduced the entertainment factor of an already excessively drawn-out song. Why have so many choruses? What about the lyrics which can never seem to rhyme properly? Ello???

Eventually, Veronica is found. Another earthquake ensues in a climax which involves Lawrence pushing Kiat aside as a "concrete block" falls, crushing Lawrence in the process. Everyone is stock still. The Hall is silent as Kiat picks up the fishbowl and starts a mournful tune. It is arguably the best vocal performance which almost brought me to tears. Thank Alvin for being 95% pitch-perfect, and bringing out the melancholiness of the tune. The plays ends abruptly. How come liddat one?

Overall, I give it 4 stars... the above remarks are due to my vindicative nature in nit-picking out irritating details in a play which is not meant to be a professional performance. But come on lah. If you want people to sing, make sure they CAN sing. If you want people to act, make sure they CAN act. If not, I'm sure the COGS youth congregation can reveal a few more diamonds in the rough to be polished up for future endeavours. That's my take.


Cheers,

Crawldaddy